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This blog discusses suicide and suicidal ideation. If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org.
There can be no denying the spectrum of difficulties teens in this era face; family dynamics, academic pressure, finding an accepting friend group, bullying, body image, peer pressure, and social media influences. Within each of these, there is a range of what each individual copes with. For example, whereas one teen might be under tremendous pressure from their family to perform at a certain level in school, another might feel hopeless if they perceive no one in their home life truly cares about how they do at school or in other activities. One teen might have developed stronger coping skills than another to deal with peer pressure, body image, or relationships with friends. But what happens when teens, some of whom may already be silently battling mental health issues, begin to rely on connections they make within online groups?
Unfortunately, in recent years there has been a rise in suicide and violent acts from teens who associate online with those who idolize the actions of the two Columbine shooters, promote self-harm, and are part of the subculture known as the True Crime Community. With the significant amount of time teens spend online, it becomes nearly impossible for parents to know who they are associating with or subgroups they may have even inadvertently become involved. After reading about a thirteen-year-old girl in Kentucky who took her own life, and later was discovered to have been part of the True Crime Community and impacted by the Columbine effect, we thought it might be beneficial to discuss several of these subcultures to bring awareness to adults and teens alike.
The Columbine Effect: The "Columbine Effect" refers to the phenomenon where the two shooters from Columbine High School in 1999 are revered for their violent actions. Teens in this subculture hold tight to the myth that the shooters were a pair of outcast loners who took action against other students they felt had bullied them for years. In an article from The Atlantic, Dave Cullen explains, “The legend hinges on bullying, but the killers never mentioned it in the huge trove of journals, online posts, and videos they left to explain themselves. The myth was so insidious because it cast the ruthless killers as heroes of misfits everywhere.” There is a connection between the Columbine Effect and suicide. Those in this subculture struggling with mental health issues may see suicide as a component of violence. Factors such as depression, social isolation, bullying, and other mental health issues can make them more susceptible to suicidal thoughts.
True Crime Community: With the combination of media, public interest, and information accessibility, the True Crime Community has grown over the years. Teens engaging in the True Crime Community (TCC) can become desensitized to violence, romanticize the motives behind violent crimes, and create an unhealthy obsession with victims and perpetrators. Some online forums and social media groups promote toxic discussions of distressing content and suicide which exacerbate mental health issues. Teens' anxiety, fears, and paranoid feelings can be amplified. Various cases where teens posted online about suicide in True Crime Communities not only were unreported, but comments sometimes encouraged the idea, compelling the teen to follow through with the action.
TikTok: Some parts of TikTok expose teens to disturbing content, cyberbullying, comparison that leads to self-esteem issues, as well as misleading information about mental health conditions. Many young people, lacking access to mental health services or trying to keep the state of their mental health hidden, often turn to social media for information and advice. Amnesty International Researcher Lisa Dittmer wrote about TikTok's recommender system findings; “TikTok’s manipulative and addictive design practices are designed to keep users engaged for as long as possible. They also show that the platform’s algorithmic content recommender system, credited with the rapid global rise of the platform, exposes children and young adults with pre-existing mental health issues at serious risk of harm.” Not all information shared on social media is accurate or helpful. Teens may share online instead of with a family member or a professional, coming to rely on online connections where they can encounter misleading advice or unqualified opinions that could worsen their mental health.
The online world in which teens engage is not going away anytime soon and can be a positive place for teens to connect, but it also presents parents with a tremendously challenging situation. How do parents know what content their children are engaging with and who their child might be spending countless hours talking to?
Here are a few things parents should be watchful of:
1) Changes in behavior such as aggression, irritability, or withdrawal
2) Changes in interests and/or school performance
3) Lack of empathy and indifference to violence
4) Fascination with violence or the discussion of graphic content
5) Secretive behavior where they are reluctant to discuss how they spend their time online
6) Learning that your child participates in violent online games and communities
Our world is fast-paced and ever-changing. As adults, we also face so many stressors that can impact our own mental health. But even as parents deal with adult challenges, it is crucial never to turn a blind eye to anything that seems even slightly off with the children we love and care about, thinking it is just a normal “growing pain” that will work itself out. In our society, many parents find themselves walking a fine line between giving room for individuality and personal expression while setting limits and monitoring their children’s activities and friends. Some recoil at the thought of being labeled a “helicopter parent”. This is undoubtedly the hard work of being a parent to a teenager today, compounded by the seductive nature of social media. Honest communication and teaching them to think critically about the things they see online is vital. For parents, understanding the value teens place on independence and privacy, as well as keeping informed about their online activity is a daunting task, but respecting their space and being approachable can help maintain a healthy relationship.
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